insomnia. now thats a bit drastic....this situation doesn't need to become any more over dramatized.  yes there seems to be a new emptiness.  one that the gallons of grease on your big mac cant fill.....but id prefer it to remain empty anyways.  we'll all look now for a cheap fix to help ease into the newly born resentment that we can only blame onto ourselves.  the lights of the carosel fade....the music dims and becomes the perfect backdrop for the ending.  instead id rather stay and watch from a distance if only jsut to glimpse into the storybook that could have been mine....ours.......does it even matter?

I can't believe they replaced me and didn't even let me know about it.......and i was about to stand up..........those fucking pieces of dog fecies stuck on the bottom of my god dam new sneakers.  Yes burn in hell.......but ill still be nice because that's what im told to do.

Im also amazed that i use to think he slept with her. i mean it wouldnt of even made sense.....but i still believe he had something with her.......they all do. if only i could be the angel faced demon with webbed toes that attracts men as bug zappers do flies. your so ugly it makes you vain.

we all try to randomize the patterns of our existance. sleeping soundly as the night prowler creeps inside just to peek into the mind of another.......maybe one who is a bit different than the rest, but all that these unwanted visitors come to find is dissappointment from the very place where they have been made..      why are your comasetic thoughts pinned so forcefully into the viens   who has ever been given the glory to decide the fate of the rest of their time, why would we like to know the future when we are still stuck trying to decifer past events from times when nothing mattered... 

1        1-3=2     3        3+1=4,5-1=4      5       5+1=6      5+3-1=7     5+3=8       1+5+3=9

now the that works have been spliced from the tounge of our unworthy competedor we wonder why the door was locked to begin with.    the stole items assist in your misory as you wander into places  where you never wanted to be.  i have seen what was ment to be said and heard the words throught your motions the journal entry is ripped from the notebook as the tittle just tells us that these words were never ment to be read.  its just a pitty that we were all created with this so called gift of sight..........

im listening to party on the mountain by the nitty gritty dirt band.......its actually quite entertaining.  I mean its just sample music that came with the computer but what a good choice.....................

my day was so bad i mean i came home after work was long and hellish and find a dead bird in my living room and now im sitting in my significant others apartment because he has air conditioning and i do not because my windows are covered in plastic.........

his room mate is here with his girlfriend and ill just say that im done going into the living room.....its just ackward.  livingrooms are so overrated anyways the real party is in the bathroom......

i got mexican food with a pirate hat today.....it was a good time. corey and jon have never seen me laugh so hard and honestly i though taht enchilita mixed with the taco and beans and rice would have come spewing out of my nostrils if it werent for my self control....

hmm overall i think today was a success.